Top Sledges in Cricket

Here are some sledging gems from various sources

Top Sledges

1. Rod Marsh & Ian Botham: When Botham took guard in
an Ashes match, Marsh welcomed him to the wicket with the immortal
words: “So how’s your wife & my kids?”

2. Daryll Cullinan & Shane Warne:As Cullinan was on
his way to the wicket, Warne told him he had Been waiting 2 years for
another chance to humiliate him. “Looks like you spent it eating,”
Cullinan retorted.

3. Glenn McGrath (bowling to portly Zimbabwean chicken
farmer Eddo Brandes): “Hey Eddo, why are you so F**ing Fat?”
EddoBrandes: “Because every time I F*** your mother, she throws me a biscuit”

4. Robin Smith & Merv Hughes: During 1989 Lords Test
Hughes said to Smith after he played & missed:”You can’t f**king
bat”. Smith to Hughes after he smacked him to the boundary: “Hey
Merv, we make a fine pair. I can’t f**king bat & you can’t f**king bowl.”

5. Merv Hughes & Javed Miandad during 1991 Adelaide
Test, Javed called Merv a fat bus conductor. A few balls later Merv
dismissed Javed: “Tickets please”, Merv called out as he ran past the
departing batsman.

6. Merv Hughes & Viv Richards during a test match in
the West Indies,Hughes didn’t say a word to Viv, but continued to
stare at him after deliveries.

“This is my island, my culture. Don’t you be staring
at me. In my culture we just bowl.” Merv didn’t reply, but after he
dismissed him he announced to the batsman: “In my culture we just
say f**k off.”

7. And of course you can’t forget Ian Healy’s
legendary comment which was picked up by the Channel 9 microphones when Arjuna
Ranatunga called for a runner on a particularly hot night during
a one dayer in Sydney…”You don’t get a runner for being an
overweight, unfit, fat c**t!!!”

8. James Ormond had just come out to bat on an ashes
tour and wasgreeted by Mark Waugh……. MW : “F*ck me, look who
it is. Mate, what are you doing out here, there’s no way you’re good
enough to play for England” JO :”Maybe not, but at least i’m the best player in my
family”

9. McGrath to Ramnaresh Sarwan: “So what does Brian
Lara’s d*ck taste like?” Sarwan: “I don’t know. Ask your wife.” McGrath
(losing it): “If you ever F*&king mention my wife again, I’ll F*ing rip
your F*fing throat out.”

10. Mark Waugh standing at second slip, the new player
(Adam Parore) comes to the crease playing & missing the first ball.
Mark – “Ohh, I remember you from a couple years ago in Australia. You
were sh*t then, you’re fu*king useless now”. Parore- (Turning around)
“Yeah, that’s me & when I was there you were going out with that old,
ugly sl*t & now I hear you’ve married her. You dumb c*nt”.

11. Yet another Australian witticism with this time
porky Sri Lankan batsman Arjuna Ranatunga the victim. Shane Warne,
trying to tempt the batsman out of his crease mused what it took to get
the plump character to get out of his crease and drive.
Wicketkeeper Ian Healy piped up, “Put a Mars Bar on a good length. That
should do it.”

12. Ravi shastri v/s the aussie 12th man (don’t
remember who, and don’t want to slander anyone ) shastri hits it to this
guy and looks for a single…this guy gets the ball in and says “if
you leave the crease i’ll break your f***ing head” Shastri: “if you
could bat as well as you can talk you wouldn’t be the f***ing 12th
man”

13. Malcolm Marshall was bowling to David Boon who had
played and missed a couple of times. Marshall : “Now David, Are
you going to get out now or am I going to have to bowl around the
wicket and kill you?”

14. Fred Trueman bowling. The batsman edges and the
ball goes to first slip, and right between Raman Subba Row’s legs. Fred
doesn’t say a word.At the end of the over, Row ambles past Trueman
and apologizes sheepishly. “I should’ve kept my legs together, Fred”.
“So should your mother” he replied.

Sources : 1, 2

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Top Sledges in Cricket

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